My favorite Northern heroine is Mother Byckerdick. She was very assertive in getting supplies for her "boys". I love the stories about how she would march right into the officers' messes and take the food treats (fresh fruit, jams, sugar) back to the boys in the hospital. She was a great administrator and organized the supply lines to get food and medical supplies to the front lines.
My favorite Southern heroine is Rose O'Neal Greenhow. She showed bravery as a spy and was a good diplomate who went to England to represent the South.